imperfect contemplation

“God giveth and God taketh away.”

I’ve heard that before. From a Bible, I think.

In Islam, we learned,

“For indeed, with hardship [will be] ease. Indeed, with hardship [will be] ease.” (Q.S. 94 Ash-Sharh: 5-6)

I know, those verses do not have the same “meaning”. But in my paralleled (and probably twisted) mind of mine, they are. Not the same, maybe, but related; at least, in my imperfect contemplation last night.

God gave me incredible children, alhamdulillah. All are smart and fluent in reading Al Qur’an. My oldest is now a freshman in Universitas Indonesia majoring Japanese. So is his sister, a freshman in Universitas Islam Negeri majoring English. And my youngest has just started his first grade in elementary, and already fluent in reading and typing/writing. God gave me great offsprings, alhamdulillah.

And to balance it all, God took away my soulmate. I’ve none, since the end of 2013. And judging from my life so far, reaching the age of 40, I’m pretty sure that my soulmate is dead. I can literally hear God speaks, “Thou needed no mate.” 😀

Well, if God wanted so, what can I do? I can only wish God would also added “total numb of the heart” in one package for such destiny to me. Hehe.. Would that be considered cheating—hope not. Because I’m a creature of romance. Loveless life is too painful for me. So, all I can ask of God is numbness, for my soulmate is dead.

The rest? I’ll just enjoy the ride. Then, again, I hear God says, “With hardship [will be] ease. Indeed, with hardship [will be] ease.”

Oh dear, Allah, is this a reminder of me, that You alone is sufficient for me?

hasbunallah-wa-nimal-wakil

May you all have a great Friday

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